The power of Santa!

One of the best parts of Christmas is Santa....not really Santa the man, but more like Santa the Leverage...the dark cloud..the coal toting,present hording Santa. I love holding the threat of Coal over my children's head..telling them that Santa is watching and is thinking of withholding mountains of toys from them, it's pure power!! And I will use, and yes sometimes abuse this power throughout the months of October, November and December. I also get to enjoy a lot more "alone" time with Paul...if I just say six words "we need to talk about Christmas" we can get a good 1/2 hour alone....oh yes, Christmas is magic.

Yesterday I picked up the boys from school, when they got in the car I asked them how their day went. Nick said "something bad happened at school today."

Me:"What?!"

Smiling Nick replied: "a girl in my class did something mean, and she does this ALL the time"

Me: "What did she do...do I need to come down to the school and teach her a lesson :)"

Nick: "She told on me, and got me in trouble in front of the whole class"

Me: "Nick....what did you do?"

Nick, very innocently replies: " I just sang her a song.."

Me: "how did this song go?"

Nick,laughing uncontrollably now sings: "boys go to college to get more knowledge and girls go to Jupiter to get more stupider."

The whole car is now in hysterics...even I am laughing. Then I stop and explain to Nick he is the one that looks stupid because he's the one with bad grammar...I mean "More Stupider" that's not proper English. All he did was prove that girls are smart and boys say things like "More Stupider". We then proceed to drop off some dry cleaning..Nick is not happy about this, so I promise him a treat when we are done. I leave the kids in the car and run into the cleaners...When I come out I see Nick leaning halfway out of the car yelling..."my mom eats poo"! When he see's me coming he ducks back inside, and is giggling like a little girl. I realize it's time to pull out the Santa card.

Me: "Wow Nick, I didn't know you liked coal that much."

Nick: "What do you mean?"

Me: "well obviously that's all you want for Christmas...I mean, your teasing girls at school and yelling that your mom eats poo out of the car window...I just figured you love coal and that's why your trying to get that for Christmas instead of presents"

Nick " oh man...are you serious"

Me: "yeah...but maybe, just maybe if your good for the next 8 days Santa will bring you a present or two...but I don't know, you've been pretty bad."

Nick: "Do i still get a treat at the gas station?"

Me: "Sure, but only because it's probably the last thing your ever going to get."

Then I look in the back of the car a notice my sweet Jonas is crying.

Me: "Jonas whats wrong?"

Jonas: "I don't want Nick to get coal for Christmas...and I'm his older brother I should be trying harder to teach him to be good."

I love my Joe what a sweat heart. Then princess Grace chimes in...

Grace: "I'm always good...right mom?"

Me: "right my princess angle baby."

Oh my gosh I just read through this, I sound like a pretty ridiculous parent. I didn't really get upset at Nick for teasing a girl in class, I didn't really even get that mad about the yelling that I eat poo out of the window. But getting angry really isn't my style (unless, it's totally necessary). And besides isn't Christmas about joy and love. Oh, and Nick has the sweetest face in the entire world...he just makes me smile.

So Merry Christmas everyone....I hope you all get as much joy out of this season as I do.

Favorite song lyrics..

The other day I was driving along and a song came on the radio…It was Slip Sliding Away by Paul Simon. The following lyrics brought tiers to my eyes…it could have been my time of the month or maybe lack of sleep, but either way I LOVE when songs do that.





I know a woman
Became a wife
These are the very words she uses
To describe her life
She said a good day
Ain't got no rain
She said a bad day's when I lie in bed
And think of things that might have been




Anyways ….it made me start to think, what are your favorite lyrics? I really want to know. Paul doesn’t really get into a song lyrics, he is more into the musical quality. But for me it’s all about the lyrics. The following song is my favorite song ever…Passing Afternoon by Iron and Wine …the lyrics are the most beautiful….so I told you mine…..What’s yours?





There are times that walk from you like some passing afternoon
Summer warmed the open window of her honeymoon
And she chose a yard to burn but the ground remembers her
Wooden spoons, her children stir her Bougainvillea blooms

There are things that drift away like our endless, numbered days
Autumn blew the quilt right off the perfect bed she made
And she's chosen to believe in the hymns her mother sings
Sunday pulls its children from their piles of fallen leaves

There are sailing ships that pass all our bodies in the grass
Springtime calls her children 'till she let's them go at last
And she's chosen where to be, though she's lost her wedding ring
Somewhere near her misplaced jar of Bougainvillea seeds

There are things we can't recall, blind as night that finds us all
Winter tucks her children in, her fragile china dolls
But my hands remember hers, rolling 'round the shaded ferns
Naked arms, her secrets still like songs I'd never learned

There are names across the sea, only now I do believe
Sometimes, with the windows closed, she'll sit and think of me
But she'll mend his tattered clothes and they'll kiss as if they know
A baby sleeps in all our bones, so scared to be alone

The mishaps of frumpy shoppers in fancy stores

I don’t know if any of you know this but we moved 3 days before Halloween. During the landscaping of our yard they cut the cable so we had to call Comcast to get a new one installed, they said they had to do it Wednesday or we would have to wait until November 12^th……well Paul can’t live one day without Cable so we had to move 3 days before Halloween. Did I mention that I was throwing a party for about 40 people the Friday before Halloween…..so needless to say it was a stressful week, but I pulled it off. So when my mom asked me if I wanted to go to San Francisco for a couple days’s to do some Christmas shopping I happily said yes.

I thought it was going to be a vacation, relaxing, eating great food, and maybe even see a movie. I knew I was in trouble when I got in the car with my mom to go to the airport and she started reading her list….it went on and on, and that’s when it hit me……we are shopping for 30 people!!! Then after she finished reading the list she said…” you know how we are both trying to loose some weight, well I was thinking maybe we should just eat lunch everyday and nothing else.”….so the great food was cut by a third. Suddenly it dawned on me this was not a vacation at all but a business trip, there would be no relaxing, not as much eating as I would have enjoyed (call me a pig if you like, but that is what vacations are for) and there would diffidently not be any movies, I forgot my mom doesn’t see them.

When we got to my parents house in San Fran we put down our bags, went to the bathroom and then my mom said “let’s go to Macys”. So we were off. We first tried the Lexus but the battery was dead. So then we tried the mini van (which smelled like rotting carcasses and sour milk) but its battery was also dead. Last but not least it was the Maida…a stick shift…in San Francisco. I was slightly terrified as I pulled out of the driveway onto the steep hills of San Fran. Our first stop was the Men’s Macys to look for shirts and ties. There are 11 men in my family to shop for and my mother likes to get them all a shirt and a tie. Now your thinking ….no big deal, grab a couple of shirt and a couple of ties and your set. But no you’re wrong, mother carefully picks out a shirt she likes, and then she tries to figure out which brother its best suited for …..She then gets out her list of sizes, and sometimes she even pulls out her little measuring tape to make sure the sleeves will fit just perfect. Then we try to find a tie….really I found this to be the most painfull thing about this trip. My mom takes the shirt around to the dozen or so tables of ties (each has about 100 ties on them) she picks up the ones she likes, puts them up to the shirt, keeping her favorites to compare to the other ties on the next table. It really was amazing to watch the thought she puts into each shirt and tie. Amazing and maddening. That night we shopped for five hours, we got home at 7 and watched some Jeeves and Wooster in her bed and when to sleep.

The next day we were downtown at 10:00 sharp (sans breakfast) we shopped and shopped. Every gift we bought was thought a lot about, some things were put on hold in case we found something better and then we would return and pick it up if we decided it was our favorite. We stopped at Janie and Jack ( a children’s clothing store) and I think the word cute was said at least 1000 times in the 45 min we spent there.

For lunch we went to Neiman Marcus, it’s a San Fran tradition. Let me take a moment to describe what my mother and I are wearing…I am in jeans that I have been wearing for 3 day’s and they are getting pretty sad looking, I have on a t- shirt and a cardigan that’s sleeves have bagged out . I am sporting my old running shoes (comfort first) and I am carrying a tiny PLASTIC Macys bag. My mom is wearing some Nike capries and her hefty walking sandals a dress shirt (she looks better then I do, but not much). The reason I mention this is because Neiman Marcus is sort of fancy and has I sit there waiting for a table I marvel at all the statuesque beauties in there designer closes with their designer bags. To make matters worse I order a hamburger the ladies at the next table are all eating salads and as I dip my French fries into my ketchup I am feeling a little trashy. But luckily my mom and I start laughing historically at all of this, and I am glad I am not fancy but that (like my mother) I am a relaxed person with great ability to laugh at myself.

But now that we are on the subject of how my mom and I looked while we were shopping, can I just say …we got no respect. While shopping for shoes my mom and I both had our arms full of shoes, and no one would help us. I am shore they were “thinking those frumpy ladies won’t be buying very many, but they are going to want to try on everything”. At Bloomingdales I had upset stomach and had to find a bathroom…only a really trashy lady would have diarrhea in a Bloomingdales ….needless to say we got no respect there either. We ended our day at 8:00 pm…..we had shopped for 10 hours!!! But we got a lot done. The next day was the same another 10 hours of shopping. Then on Saturday we wondered around Fillmore and Union looking in all the little shops (again getting no respect) we had lunch at a Chinese restaurant and then caught our plane.

It defiantly wasn’t a vacation….but I had a great time with my mother. I love her more than words can say. She is so thoughtful in her gift giving it shows how much she cares about all of the people in her life. I learn from her every day…..oh and I lost 2 lbs, I guess just eating lunch has its plusses.

The new house

So I moved, you all seemed interested in hearing about it so I will tell you.......I moved to a far away place called, Orem. Yes I know that's only about 7 min from were I lived before but to my family it's like I moved to Alaska or China. Though those 7 min to make a big difference, my kids no longer go to school with 6 of there cousins. I can no longer call Maryann or Diana when I need someone to pick up my boys in a pinch. No one stops by any longer....which is a good thing and a bad thing. I have to say that when my mother would stop by at nine a clock in the morning and my house was a mess and I was a mess...it was not my favorite thing. But when she would come by at 2:00 and take my kids for a little while...I did enjoy that.

Well back to the house...we looked at this house about 3 yrs ago when we first moved back to Utah. We loved it but decided to wait.....when we started to look again at the beginning of this summer the house was still on the market but had been remodeled a bit. They had updated the kitchen a little and re carpeted and painted the inside with some terrible colors. So when we bought it the first thing to do was repaint and put in a new master bathroom......my dream room, the thing I have been waiting for. I LOVE baths, and in our old house there was no real tub, and I shared the bathroom with three kids so it was always disgusting, but not my new one. I love it, it's a dream come true! I had a lot of fun with my house....picking out the colors was the funnest and the most stress full thing. I thought you might want a peek so here are some of my favorite room and some of the most crazy colors..
this is my bathtub.......oohhh the joy! The wall paper and the tile in the bathroom are my favorite things about my new house.
My purple master bedroom......I have the best, most secure husband ever! You can't see it but in the corner I have a black and white floral chair....it almost pushed him over the edge.
My aqua carpet in the formal living room is also something I love. I was so scared to do this, but when they put it in I loved it and I could breath again. We are still waiting for a chair and some accessories but when it's all done it will be FAB.
The previous owners had this poo brown paint in the basement with an even darker poopier trim.....the candy apple green brightened things up a bit don't you think.
Paul's office......I let him do what he wanted in there, it was my compromise for my purple bedroom.
Grace and Nick want me to show you their rooms....

Here is the Princess' bedroom...Pink, pink, pink.....she has a loft and a little hidden room and her very own bathroom. Oh the joys of being the only girl.
Nicks room is not quite finished..but I had the contractors put a little shelf trim around his room, because nick like to collect nick knacks and he needs a place to put them.

Jonas wanted RED and boy did he get it! We are putting a big black and white print of NYC on his wall above his head to break up some of the red......but the room is totally Jonas.

Well that's the house. I love it, and I can't wait to make it my home.

HELP!!!!

So I know I need to update my blog, but so much has happened I don't know were to start. I've moved, we celebrated Halloween (to busy to take pictures), we had a big party, I went on a trip with my mom, and my kids have started a new school. I am only prepared to write about one or 2 of these events.....tell me which one you would like to here about, or maybe you think I am to lazy to be a blogger ( your probably right) but feel free to tell me that too. Just give me a place to start and maybe I will get inspired. And if nobody responds I will take it has a hint and stop blogging all together.

fearless fishermen

Grandpa and Grandma Mecham took us fishing Saturday. The boys were so excited.....the girls, well...not so much.
But we put on happy faces, and Grandpa bought a pink fishing pole for the princess; so that helped.
Jonas caught the first fish,and it was a beauty.

Here and the MEN reelling in the second fish....their skills really impressed the ladies.

This is Grace BEFORE she cought her fish.....
This is the princess after..........dead fishies are both sad and scary.
Jonas and Nick were proud of their haul....you can't tell from this picture but we caught 4 rainbow trout and one cutthroat.

Grandpa is to thank for all the fish....he know all the secrets; I was very impressed. We also need to thank Grandma, for all the tasty treats.
This is the happiest Grace was all day....Going home.

I got my blood pumping!

IT’S A MIRACLE!!!! Paul and I went out on a date last night, we had a night out on the town (or at least a couple hours).I have to admit when Paul asked me to go meet his friend Jaron …who is in town from Paris,( ooh la la isn’t he fancy) I was reluctant….. First of all I had a young woman’s activity that night so we wouldn’t even be heading out the door until 9:00. Not to mention that going to a dive bar to sing karaoke after being with the young women didn’t mesh well. I was also PMSing big time, which also meant I am not Pregnant, so that pissed me off. What I am trying to say is that I was in a bad mood. But Paul’s powers of persuasion wore me down and I agreed to go out.

I lightened up when we walked into the place and Jaron was there, he’s the funniest guy, and he and Paul always make me laugh. When the karaoke began I knew I would be there a lot longer then the promised 10:30 deadline. Paul and Jaron LOVE karaoke. First Paul gets up and sings “Try a little tenderness” and between his perfect pitch and his awesome hitch kicks….he nails it. Then Jaron up and he sings “La Woman”…and you could have sworn that Jim Morrison himself was in the room. Between Jaron and Paul’s many, many, many songs I am forced to listen to some terrible singing by all the BYU students that have invaded the establishment. After listing to all the off pitch renditions of some of my favorite songs, I start to gain a little confidence in my abilities. I think….I can sing better then THAT. So I asked Paul to sing a duet with me.

When I take my first step onto the stage I know I have made a HUGE mistake. My heart is pounding and I am getting sweaty……and I know I have already broken the first cardinal rule of karaoke …”show no fear”!!! And as Paul places that microphone into my shaking hand and the music begins, I know it’s going to be a disaster. The first notes out of my mouth are shaky and best. Someone yells “Get off the stage”…I think about it for a moment…could I get away with just setting my microphone on the floor and walking off. No I have to finish, so I try to get some courage and I belt out “well you just roll over and turn out the light”…but the voice that comes out isn’t mine…it has to be someone else’s because it is just awful. The audience starts to get bored and decides to tease us by yelling “kiss” kiss”…..I probably should have just kissed Paul, at least then my mouth would have been shut….. But I don’t like to do that in front of people. The fact that I am not kissing my husband starts to be even more awkward than the singing….but Paul lightens up the crowd by saying “this is what marriage is….if you want kisses stay single”. Finally the music ends….the torture for me and the crowed is over, and as a slink back to my seat….Jaron informs me that someone said to him, “Don’t you wish they had a trap door sometimes”. I tell Jaron I sure wished they did. It would have saved me from myself and from the guy currently singing a Creed song.

I wanted to leave right away….but I stayed and slapped a smile on my face and tried to enjoy the rest of the evening. When we got home that night at 12:30 I still felt humiliated….but the more I thought about it, the more proud of myself I became. Yes I stunk up the joint and embarrassed myself…..but I tried something new and I did something scary. I got my blood pumping and that’s always a good thing!

Embrace Uncertainty

So I was watching TV today and there was this guy who was supposed to be the end all be all on spirituality. Ellen asked him what his goal was this year and he said…”I want to learn to embrace uncertainty”…….At first I was like WHAMMO …..that is just what I need to do, I need to embrace all the uncertainty in my life. That would totally solve all my problems.

Any of my readers who have known me for a long period of time, know that I had a plan for my life…I was going to marry a nice conservative republican, Mormon and live in Utah, stay at home with my kids and raise a nice little family. When I met Paul I thought WOW…this is the guy, a return missionary, a teacher at the MTC, he even asked for back issues of the Ensign for Christmas. Well a few years into our marriage we moved to California so that Paul could get his PhD in psychology. While there my honey went through some major life changes that through me for a loop. I found myself no longer married to a conservative Mormon….but to a liberal atheist. As you can imagine such a major life change is hard on any relationship, Paul may have changed, but I did not.

I don’t really change….not to any major degree. I am like an old bachelor….set in my ways. I was raised by parents who beat certain principles into my head, and they are there forever. So when all these things that Paul was going through came to the surface…. I have to say I did not handle it well…..I was angry and resentful, but mostly scared. I was scared that my children would miss out on the upbringing that I found so important. I was scared that my relationship with my husband would never be the same, we disagreed about everything, politics, religion, the way our children should be raised.....to say the least it was hard. Looking back I wish I could have been more understanding about what Paul was going through, I am sure it wasn’t easy loosing your identity and having to totally redefine yourself. But at the time I was too blinded by my own feeling to see that.

The thing that pulled us through is our sense of humor….the ability to laugh. It was all to often that we would end a hard day together in bed watching our favorite comedy …and laughing together. Humor is that one thing that we will always have in common….it’s the tie that binds. Now 6 yrs after the first question of faith…..and the change from Rush Limbaugh to Bill Maher….our marriage is better, not perfect, but better. I think that we are more honest with each other and have more of an understanding of what we are both feeling. But there is still a lot of uncertainty….Which brings me back to what that guy said about “embracing uncertainty”. When I really started to think about it, I realized it was a really stupid thing to say. You can sit at home and tell yourself, I am going to be at peace with all the things that are yet to come….but when they do come you will not always want to embrace them (nor should you). Life is full of surprises and not all of them are pleasant. I think the best we can do is learn to live with the changes and fight like crazy to keep the things that are important to us.

Paul and my marriage are important, so I am willing to make the compromises that will bring us closer together. I love so many things about Paul, he is a great father, a good provider, a smarty pants and mostly a great friend to me and I am willing to fight to keep him abound. Making sure my kids go to church and are raised in the gospel is also important to me, so I will take them to church on Sunday by myself, and do my best to instill those principle in them…and at the same time teach them to not be judgmental of others. And that everyone has there own life to live and we need to respect other people’s choices. It is a delicate dance. I just hope that in the end Paul and I will have raised some amazing kids who are able to look at their parents and know that they love each other and they didn’t just give up when things got hard but fought hard to keep the promises and the family that they made.

Grace 06

I was sick of that sad picture so I put this up instead. It makes me happy just looking at it.

Forgive me for being down....

Do you ever get sad….I have been sad lately. I don’t really enjoy it. I am usually a very happy person…..I don’t let the stresses of my life get me down, but lately I have been feeling low. It’s not depression, I don’t feel hopeless or down on myself….I just don’t really feel like myself either.

I would like to blame it on the recession….staring at the tuna at the supermarket, wondering if the 70 cents you are going to save buying the cheep stuff is worth the soggy, dark meet, tuna sandwich you are going to eat later. Then you tell yourself you will just feed it to the children ….but that’s not right...Is it? Now that’s depressing.

Or realizing as you bite into that chicken/ pork hot dog that the Jews are really the only people that have any business making hot dogs (Nathans kosher hot dogs are the best) and Western Family ketchup is so tangy and just not the same as Hines.

I really don’t think that’s it though ….I have a blessed life. I just went to Costa Rica for free! How great is that. I think that is were it all started, I came home and had to get back to the real world…why can’t I just live at the Four Seasons? I don’t think that spending 9 days in a swimsuit was good for my self esteem either. But besides wearing the swimsuit, it really was a fantastic vacation…….housekeeping and room service and beaches and family and nice restaurants.

You all hate me now….I am depressed because I had to come home from a 9 day vacation at the Four Season. Wow that does sound bad….I had better cheer up quick! Thank for letting me vent, now that I am feeling a little foolish, I will make a bigger fool of myself by posting some pictures of my awesome trip.

These first couple photos are from the annual Bryson Gualala trip...I thought I would just throw them in there.


This is what the nightly dinners look like....I think we had 25 of my family members on this trip.....but the more the merrier in my opinion.


From Nick down it is all Costa Rica...such a beautiful place and what a fun trip!

Some Cakes...just for fun, or to show off, your pick!

Well awhile back some oh you asked to see pictures of my cakes...so here they are! They are not perfect but they are fun and great memories!

The Jones is nine.....I can't believe it!!!

The other day Jonas was asked to give a talk in primary on prayer. He told me he wanted to prepare it himself, so I gave him a scripture to use and he went in his room to practice. On the way to church he told me he was ready and said he was just going to share some experiences from his life were his prayers were answered. So naturally as I sat in the primary room I was very eager to hear is talk.....and this is how it went.....He first shared his scripture and then he said " now I would like to tell you two times in my life where my prayers were answered.....One day I had a terrible stomach ache, it was so bad I didn't even know what I was going to do, so I said a prayer......and then right after I went into the bathroom and had a HUGE Diarrhea and it made me feel soooo much better!!" When I asked him why he shared that particular story he said "Adults tell funny stories in sacrament meeting all the time....it was appropriate wasn't it?" I laughed and told him it was fine.
That story epitomises my Jones....He is smart, independent, spiritual and very, very funny! Bringing Jonas into this world was a lot different then Nick....Jonas didn't fly out of my belly, he had to be pushed and pushed and finally pulled with huge tongs (and by the sweat of my drs brow) into this world. That should have been a warning to me about how the next few years were going to go. He cried all the way home from the hospital....that's when I knew I was in trouble. Here are a few of the things Jonas Hated when he was little....
Bouncy Chairs, Baby swings, any sort of spontaneous movement, cameras, loud noises, quiet, people, being outside, baths, and bugs! When Jonas was 2 we took him to Gualala on a huge Bryson family trip...he cried the whole time. The only thing that would quiet him down it watching the sound of music....he probably watched it fifteen times when we were there, my family still talks about it.
Jonas was a difficult child but a very funny one as well. He makes me laugh every day, and has since he was little. I can't believe he is nine. It blows my mind...it was just yesterday that he was 18 months and we were walking around the circle reciting the words to HOP ON POP....I would say a page and he would say a page...so cute. This last year has brought about a lot of changes in my Joe...he learned to ride a bike (something that used to terrified him)...he jumped off the deck and into the pond in Gualala....he did the zip line in Costa Rica and he ignores me most of the day. He has grown up, he no longer the fearful little boy he once was ..... I am so proud of him.
Well lets get on with it....we were home for one day in our 3 week vacation, that day was Jonas' birthday. So it wasn't very elaborate but it was fun never the less. He had a Lego Birthday cake.......


Grandma and Grandpa Meacham came over......Jonas' middle name it Alan after Paul's step father.
He got some Lego's from his parent and a really cool cruiser bike....It's black with flames on it...so cool.
Here are the Top Ten things I love about Jonas
1. He is SO SO funny.......Have I mentioned he's funny?
2. He's really smart
3. He sleeps in tightie whities every night and wears a red robe in the morning to cover up.
4. He also sleeps with ear plugs and a mask (which is funny because he also wants the door open and the bathroom light on)
5. He reads a lot
6. He is so nice to everyone
7. He is a great piano player
8. He is in love with Britney an will tell anyone who asked (he says she is the only one in the world who is allowed to push him on a swing)
9 He has never been afraid to be himself....never!
10. He wants to be a brain doctor and a children's author.